Category Archives: Poetry

The Modern Necromancers

zombies2

Consume and be filled
That is the purpose, for that you were summoned
Up from the depths to view the treasures of heaven
Paraded before your eyes by the modern necromancers
Marketing the latest cure for the emptiness
The emptiness that is an unfilled void within the breast
Calling out to be filled, yet never satisfied for more than an instant
Once they were men and women with hopes and dreams
But through some devilry they were warped into mindless thralls
Enslaved by commerce rather than some dark magic
Yearning for the next item that promises to satisfy the unending hunger
For they are consumers, that is the only drive they know
Consume and be filled

Composed Neil White 2013

The inspiration for this was an article linking George Romero’s Night of the Living Dead, the forefather of most modern zombie movies, games and shows, with a critique of the capitalistic drive for consumption. To follow through on the imagery it gave rise to some dark words.

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Remembering Bonhoeffer: The Powers of Good

Four of the ten 20th Century Martyrs above the west door of Westminster Abby, installed in 2000. From left to right: Grand Archduchess Elizabeth of Russia, Martin Luther King, Jr., Bishop Romero, Pastor Bonhoeffer

Four of the ten 20th Century Martyrs above the west door of Westminster Abby, installed in 2000. From left to right: Grand Archduchess Elizabeth of Russia, Martin Luther King, Jr., Bishop Romero, Pastor Bonhoeffer

Dietrich Bonhoeffer was executed at Flossenberg Concentration Camp on April 9, 1945, and at some other point I am sure I will share more reflections since his writings have definitely shaped me in many ways, but today I am just going to share one of his lesser known poems. Many people will share his famous “Who Am I” poem, but this is one of my favorites (and if you look back at Golgatha you will probably see some resonance):

Powers of Good (December 28, 1944)

 

With every power for good to stay and guide me,

comforted and inspired beyond all fear,

I’ll live these days with you in thought beside me,

and pass, with you, into the coming year.

 

The old year still torments our hearts, unhastening;

the long days of our sorrow still endure;

Father, grant to the souls thou hast been chastening

that thou has promised, the healing and the cure

 

Should it be ours to drain the cup of grieving

even to the dregs of pain, at thy command,

we will not falter, thankfully receiving

all that is given by thy loving hand.

 

But should it be thy will once more to release us

to life’s enjoyment and its good sunshine,

that which we’ve learned from sorrow shall increase us,

and all our life be dedicate as thine.

 

Today, let candles shed their radiant greeting;

lo, on our darkness are they not thy light

leading us, haply, to our longed-for meeting?

Thou canst illumine even our darkest night.

 

When now the silence deepens for our harkening,

grant we may hear thy children’s voices raise

for all the unseen world around us darkening

their universal paean, in thy praise.

 

While all the powers of good aid and attend us,

boldly we’ll face the future, come what may.

At even and at morn God will befriend us,

and oh, most surely on each newborn day!

(Bonhoeffer 1953, 400f)

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Empty Wells: A Poem

scarcity

When the wells of the soul run dry
From watering and nourishing the fruit of the vine
In the middle of the wilderness
Do we accept that drought is a part of life
That every day, every season, every year cannot produce a bumper crop
Do we migrate to new watering holes, abandoning the old vines
Seeking fertile pastures with abundant water
Do we drill deeper into the will and the spirit trying to wrest from the barren ground
Some new spiritual spring hidden deep within, some reserve that may or may not be there
Digging deeper so that we may truly exhaust the waters of life
Or do we pray for rain?

Neil White 2013

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Three Days- A Poem

Statue of Mary Magdalene in Mission Santa Monica

Statue of Mary Magdalene in Mission Santa Monica

Three days has my master been gone
Three days since those he loved scattered
Three days since receiving his pierced and battered body
One final gift from the hands of our oppressors

Three days of mourning and preparations
Three days of weeping and working
Three days of trying to hold on to a man who is dead
The tomb awaits the payment of grief

The first day of the week has come
A time of new beginnings, of beginning anew
Yet I find myself walking towards the end, towards death itself
As I walk towards the gaping and devouring maw of the tomb

O tomb, you who could devour life itself
Who hold within you the remains of one who lifted a child from your jaws
One who denied you your prize, who snatched youth from your hands
Now perhaps you can laugh as you hold the one who denied you in your craw

Three days you have haunted me O death
Three days have I journeyed into your home
Three days have I tried to ward off your foul stench for this man’s sake
This man who made me a human and no longer a walking corpse

Three years did I journey with him,
Three years ago did he free me from the demons who tore at the corners of my mind
Three years of freedom and of being a human and not an object of shame
This man who I followed out of Magdala

Three days and I confront once again my fears
Do my demons lurk within this tomb?
Does my fragile self find itself destroyed by maw of death?
Yet, through my fear, for the memory of this true person I defy you.

Three of us walk together, three women, three lost ones
Three and yet incomplete without the one who lies behind the immovable rock
Three unable to pry open the jaws of the grave to snatch his life out of it
Uneasy, uncertain we walk towards the heart of the earth

Yet, as we approach you in the cold dawning of the day your mouth lies open
What has happened, have our oppressors taken away the one last gift we had
Have they shamed him even more, have they taken away our wrestling with death
Can we stand at the gaping maw of death without his presence?
Yet within the tomb sits a young man, a man in white
In the darkness, in the midst of death, youth that will not die sits
Our search ends with his puzzling message,
Our search begins with words that cannot breach our deadened senses
“Fear not, the one you seek is not here, he has gone ahead of you”

Fear not, and yet fear—a fear greater even than my fear of death overwhelms me
Who is this sitting here, who was the Jesus who lay here, what is he?
Is this the first day of a new creation, or is this truly the end?
How do I go home, how can I move, how can I tell his shattered disciples this?

Could I bear the rebuke of being a foolish woman whose dreams are shattered again?
Could I turn back home and tell what I’ve seen, do I even believe it myself?
Could I make the journey back to Galilee and wait for the Lord who lay in the tomb three days?
Or does fear reign in my body and in Mary and in Salome?

O tomb I taunted you, O death I defied you, but you I knew.
But now you stand open while my mouth is sealed shut
I feared your presence while you contained my Lord, now I cannot stand in your presence at all
Fear, confusion, amazement, wonder, silence
I run away

Perhaps the day will come when the stone over my own mouth is rolled away
Perhaps it too will take three days, or three months or three years
Perhaps it will take me finding the Lord who has been spirited away
“Fear not…he has gone ahead of you.”

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Stay Here and Keep Watch-A Poetic Meditation for Good Friday

Andrew Mantegne's Agony in the Garden

Andrew Mantegne’s Agony in the Garden

Stay here for just a moment and keep watch in the garden.
Where love is betrayed and where friends are spared
Where a beloved one brings soldiers and temple police
Where love endures and does not shirk away from the consequences of loving the loveless
Where swords are sheathed and wounds are healed
Where the healer is treated as the rebel, the lover as a bandit
Where the evening of violence has its say, yet even strong men seem reluctant to place the one claiming
“I am he” in chains
Stay here and watch as love comes down the mountain so that others may go free

Michelangelo Merisis da Carvaggio, The Denial of Saint Peter

Michelangelo Merisis da Carvaggio, The Denial of Saint Peter

Stay here for just a moment and keep watch in the courtyard
Where love is betrayed and friends are spared
Where a beloved one stands around a charcoal fire
Attempting to hold fast to the love that has been taken away by the loveless
Where a sheathed sword goes with a wounded soul
Where the one named rock becomes broken, the faithful one becomes faithless
Where the evening of violence has its say and even the rock seems unable to remain strong
“I am not” he claims
Stay here and watch as strength fails and confidence flees in the cold night

Jesus en casa de Anas by Jose de Madrazo Agudo

Jesus en casa de Anas by Jose de Madrazo Agudo

Stay here for just a moment and keep watch in the household of Caiphas
Where love is betrayed and the a people is spared
“For it is better for one person to die for the people”
As the cannibalistic logic of human sacrifice gives up on love for the sake of security
Where love is bound and struck across the face
Where hatred is sharpened on the grindstone of fear
The evening of violence with his own question, “Are you the son of God?”
“You say that I am”
Stay here and watch as testimony is transformed into terror

Mihaly Munkasy, Christ Before Pilate

Mihaly Munkasy, Christ Before Pilate

Stay here for just a moment and keep watch in the courtyard of Pilate
Where love is betrayed and an empire watches
When the leaders of the chosen nation bow down before the eagle of Rome
Where uncleanness is avoided at the cost of corruption
Where charges become spears and accusations become daggers
Where love is turned criminal and might makes right
Where the morning of violence makes its accusations
Silence is the only answer
Stay here and watch as the crowd becomes a mob

Matthias Storm, Christ Crowned with Thorns

Matthias Storm, Christ Crowned with Thorns

Stay here for just a moment and keep watch in the headquarters of the occupying army
Where love is betrayed as the legion mocks
Where purple is used to mock and crowns are made of thorns
Where mercy looks like beating and justice a cat of nine tails
Where titles of honor become mockeries of disdain
Where spears and swords are the real power
Where a violence owns the day and power shapes reality asking
“What is truth?”
Stay here and watch as the love is abused by power

Hieronymus Bosch, Christ Carrying the Cross

Hieronymus Bosch, Christ Carrying the Cross

Stay here just for a moment and keep watch in the midst of the mob
Where love is betrayed and hatred is fueled by fear
Where a people turn from the dream of hope to the certainty of death
Where the fires of anger are stoked by the desperation for someone to blame
Where mercy and justice corrode in the illusive certainty of self-deception
Where words are more deadly than swords, a mob more dangerous than an army
The morning of violence passes its sentence
“Crucify, Crucify”
Stay here and watch as truth is the casualty of fear

Antonio Ciseri, Ecce Homo (Behold the Man)

Antonio Ciseri, Ecce Homo (Behold the Man)

Stay here just a moment and keep watch at Gabbatha, the stone pavement
Where justice is consumed by the gaping jaws of blind rage
Where the people betray their own identity to become the servants of violence
Where love endures and does not shirk away from the consequences of loving the loveless
Where rage demands the life of the innocent and freedom for the bandit
Where the wages of love are death and cost of healing is execution
The morning of violence cries out its judgment
“Crucify, crucify.”
Stay here and watch as the horror presses on unstoppable

White Crucifixion, Marc Chagall

White Crucifixion, Marc Chagall

Stay here just a moment and keep watch at Golgatha, the place of the skull
Where love is killed and the world stops
Where darkness rules in the midst of the day
Where nails and spears deny love the air it needs to breath
Where the King of the Jews becomes the slave of the cross
Where justice and mercy are traded for death
The afternoon of violence has had its say and love utters its final words
“It is finished”
Stay here and watch as it is finished but not complete

Garden Tomb considered by some to be the site of the burial and resurrection

Garden Tomb considered by some to be the site of the burial and resurrection

Stay here just for a moment and keep watch in the garden
Where love is laid in a tomb and the beloved ones weep
Where hope seems lost and violence seems to be truth
Where the crucified one is placed in a tomb
Where the world enters into the silence of Sabbath without its Lord
Where everything stops and death has its word
The silence of Sabbath and the closed lips of the tomb utter
“It is finished”
Stay here and watch until the certainty of death and darkness, violence and power, rage and fear have their say

The Resurrection of Christ by Piero della Francesca

The Resurrection of Christ by Piero della Francesca

Stay here just a moment longer and keep watch on this night and one night more
Where we wait for the day when truth is reborn
Where love triumphs over hatred
Where peace wins over violence
Where life is liberated from death
When the silence of Sabbath gives way to the beginning of new creation
And the voices of the grieving proclaim
“He is risen”
Stay here and watch knowing that resurrection is coming

purple rose 01 by picsofflowers.blogspot.com

Golgotha

White Crucifixion, Marc Chagall

White Crucifixion, Marc Chagall

Alone, life is over,
Those whom I ask to wait for me enter into sleep
A sleep deeper than death itself
Seconds creep by, minutes last for years
As I wait for my Father to answer me
Yet no answer comes.

Life, truly lived in God blessed abundance
Good friends, those who love me and whom I love
Those who would drink my cup, those who would share my bread
And yet for them I am alone waiting on the Father
Yet no answer comes.

Love, freely given and rarely returned
The religious mock me and the educated despise me
A few closer than brothers and sisters I have drawn near
Yet the same God brings love and separation
So still I sit alone and await an answer from the Father
Yet no answer comes.

Torment, yet it is the cup I choose
I could allow this cup to pass; yet I drink it to the dregs
I take on the curse so others might have a blessing
For those who curse me and those I have drawn near
I sit alone, the answer from the Father
I am the answer.

Betrayal, a brother draws near
With a kiss comes a wound deeper than any sword or spear
One who shared my bread rends my heart in two
I stand surrounded, forsaken by the Father
I am the answer for Judas.

Abandoned, every brother and sister scattered
For the fear of death my name forgotten and denied
All whom I opened myself to now flee as I sit on the altar
Accused, Spat upon, Beaten, a lamb for slaughter
I am the answer for the scattered.

Hated, I bear the weight of Jerusalem
An earthly kingdom I would not claim, so a thief’s death they select
Nothing did I take, only love did I give
Yet in my love I uncovered hatred so dark that hell could not contain it
Marked, Broken, Despised, a Scapegoat
I am the answer for a conquered people.

Disregarded, shown contempt as a peasant
I do not even merit the time of the procurator, only the fervor of the city’s hatred
Places me as King of the Jews before the vassal of Caesar
The power to judge I could wield, yet instead to earthly power I yield
I become the crucified one for the Romans
I am the answer for the empire.

Hung on the mountain, exposed to the world
I bear witness to a kingdom present given my form
I stake my claim as I gasp for air in the God forsakenness of Golgotha
I bear the rebellion of humanity waging war against the Creator
I am love hung on a cross for the world, the embrace of the Father
I am the answer for all creation.

I hang on the cross today bearing the sins of a world come of age
Aging but still turned inward on itself, consuming its own flesh
A world that may know my name, but has forgotten who I am
A world who no longer needs me, but is intent on saving itself at the cost of its own life
Creation is smothered and the oppressed are crushed
The powerful are caught in their paranoia and fathers disown their children
Wives seek other lovers and leaders devour their followers
The blood of the earth cries out for vindication, the desecrated heavens shout for judgement
Yet here I hang, the lamb, the scapegoat, the crucified one, love it self
Forsaken for the world’s sake, and yet I am
I am the answer for the world
Does anyone question anymore?

Composed Neil White, 2013

Updated from a poem originally written in 2002

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At the Table- A Meditation and Poem for Maundy Thursday

The Last Supper by Pascal Adolphe Dagnan-Bouvret

The Last Supper by Pascal Adolphe Dagnan-Bouvret

At the table with the others who will stumble and fall
Here with the one who touched us each in our turn
Healing our sickness, dispelling our demons, freeing us from our captivity
At least for the moment we are reclining at the table, a part of the feast
With Peter and John and James, Mary Magdalene and Martha and Lazarus
With saints of all ages and times and sinners from far and near
On this night we are there with them sharing in the feast of deliverance
From slave to liberation, from outsider to insider
No titles, no ranks, no stations or wealth matter here
For at the table this night we are all guests of the Lord
Bound together by his love

On this night we call Maundy, we receive the mandate
A call to love as we have been loved
To serve as we have been served
To make others clean as we have been made clean
Though we may deny and betray the Lord who joins us together
With our words
With our actions
With our hatred
With our exclusion
With our prejudice
With our pride
With our clinging to the old order rather than seeking God’s kingdom
With our addictions to power and wealth and privilege
With our own self-righteousness
Like Judas we may value money over God’s dream
Like Peter we may not be able to see how a master can serve
Or perhaps in our attempts to follow in his tracks we will deny we know him
Before the cock crows in the morn
We come with all the others, as unexpected and unworthy guests of the Lord of love
Receiving forgiveness and mercy, his prayers and his love
Tonight we are a part of the gathering of the feast that is to come in the kingdom

Though we know the story, we know these things, we know to love
And we are blessed to be called to do them
To wash feet
To share a meal
To extend forgiveness
To love as we have been loved
To remember again the story that shapes our lives
And to come again to the table to share in the gifts of grace
We are called and gathered here as one
No longer separated as
men and women
slave and free,
Jew and Gentile,
Righteous and unrighteous
Saint and sinner
Lord and servant
Rich and poor
Powerful and pariah
No here we are all beloved
Maybe we are God lovers,or seekers,or lost,or confused
Wondering how it is that we find ourselves here on this night
Yet here we are and once again we are
Washed and cleansed, yet needing to be washed again
Fed and yet not satisfied, with the foretaste until the feast itself comes
Made holy and yet still we may walk from this place labeled by others as a sinner
Forgiven and yet still not free from being led into temptation
And yet we are here at the table this night
As we are moved by God towards our liberation
We share bread and the cup
The bread of affliction is turned into a sampling of the kingdom of heaven
The cup of sorrow is transformed into the elixir of new life
As Christ offers himself to us again and meets us here at the table
As one who serves, so that we might learn to serve
As one who love, so that we might learn to love
As one who forgives, so that we might learn to forgive
As one who welcomes the stranger, as we might welcome the stranger
Shaped and formed by the practice of love to be those who can love one another
So that others may know whose we are
We are those who were here at the table
Invited and shaped by the loving Lord who hosts us this night

Composed Neil White 2013

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Betrayal- A Poem

Apophysis-Betrayal (1footonthedawn at deviantart.com)

Apophysis-Betrayal (1footonthedawn at deviantart.com)

A friend, a lover, a confidant, the one who I let down my armor to
I accepted the blame for another’s actions
And I slowly let the blade of betrayal slide between my ribs and into my heart
How could someone who once brought such joy cause such pain
And not shed a tear over the ruins of a relationship that took years to build

Were you ever what I saw in you? Or was it all just an illusion
Some spell conjured to confound and confuse
Or did someone remove the heart that once beat within your breast
Did some earlier wound fill your heart and soul with scar tissue
How else can you stand there unmoved as my life essence pools on the ground
Drowning the dreams of the future and the joy of the present
How could I be so blind?

As I journey through the wasteland of broken dreams, a shadow of my former self
To the world I stood strong, withstanding every challenge and melee
Little did I know where the true danger lay, where the sword that would pierce my soul resided
Yet it is not anger I feel, maybe somewhere down the road, but rather I still find myself unable to believe
The wound and the wounder, the blade and its wielder
And within it all my own trust lying shattered on the floor

Composed Neil White 2013

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The Return of the Robins

robins02172007

The winter winds scream against the walls of the house
Blowing frozen crystals from the sky
But the sentinels of spring have arrived
Their orange breasts foreshadowing the warmer times to come
A time of new life, a season of new colors and sounds

The winter has muted the pallet that the world was painted in
For three months the world has born its coat of white and grey
But the days are coming when new life will emerge from the compost of the preceding year
When greens and yellows, blues and reds emerge in the earth and the sky
Flowers will burst forth, leaves will again cover the naked branches of the trees
The earth will yield the bounty of its life in the fruit of the field

The skies will fill with birds and insects, chirping and buzzing over the lake
The squirrels and rabbits will chase each other around my backyard
And black soil stands ready for the bounty to come
The robins have returned, the advance guard of the army of life that will invade our slumbering land
Spring is coming, life begins anew

Composed Neil White, 2013

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Creative Words: A Poem

Creation by Selfish Eden (deviantart.com)

Creation by Selfish Eden (deviantart.com)

A clever turn of phrase or a verbal picture
In the beginning come the words
And in their own Genesis they craft a new world
Painting with the spirit of imagination
Breathing new life where once only an abyss rested
The words emerge and join together
As bones and sinews
Muscles and skin
Life emerges from the bone yard of the void
Once they emerge they take their own form and have their own life
Each one its own character to be savored and relished
Evoking sights and smells
Sounds feelings and emotions
Recreating the past
Re-imagining the future
Each one has the potential to unearth memories long forgotten
Some use their indelible ink to tattoo themselves on the soul
The realities they create may be harsh and brutal
In their dystopic world we see the dark side of reality
The truths we would rather not see
The sins we would prefer remain buried
Words that rend the world and pierce the soul
Sometimes the poet and the prophet are one
Crying tears of sorrow over words that cannot be contained
And a people whose ears no longer hear and eyes no longer see
Yet words uttered from the same mouth may ache of passion and love
Calling us to hope
Lightening our darkness
Pointing to potentiality and power unimagined
And a future seen only through the hopes and dreams of faith
But they are never just words
They are echoes of the deep language that pours its magic into the world
They point to the real and imagined
They define and name
They build up and tear down
Words set loose on the world
Bearing the best and worst of humanity’s heart
Laying naked the mind and soul
A mirror showing the sacred and profane blended together
For the world the words create reflect the heart of their creator
They go forth to create
They rattle around in the eardrums and the imaginations
Of those who have eyes to see and ears to hear
For in the beginning the words come
The Genesis, the beginning of all the potential worlds they might create
And in the end, when their pneumatic inspiration ceases
Remains the apocalypse of new creation
Unveiled within our memory

Composed Neil White, 2013

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